March is about trusting.

Trusting March

Tomorrow welcomes March. I have written about it here

March is my least favorite month of the year.

For us New Englanders, March is unpredictable.

I so hate the not knowing.

I hate that I cannot predict.

Snow?

Melting of snow?

Daffodils popping up?

A warm day?

It is all in Mother's Nature's hand.

What I want and what Mother nature/spirit/ God gives to me sometimes doesn't make sense.

So I trust.

 March is about trusting!

Good days lie ahead regardless of the weather.

Spring always comes.

Let's make March about trusting.

If I trust,  March might become the best month of the year.!

Ler's all trust!

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Blessings,
Virginia
Happy March!

Monday's Course In Miracles

I am blessed as a child of God. All good things are mine, because God intended them for me. ACIM

My Mom

Eleven years ago today my mom died.

My dad called to let me know.

"Your mom loves you and so do I."

I knew it was coming.

I had already said goodbye as I rubbed her feet.

My mom was at death's door when she gave birth to me, her tenth child.

Yes TENTH.

She told me the story many times.

My mom's prayer at my birth, "Don't leave Joe with 10 kids. Let me raise this child."

My words to my mom as I rubbbed her feet, " You can go mom. You raised me. I'm okay. Heaven has no altzheimers...But I am going to need you. "

My Mom has been here all of these eleven years.

Call me crazy.

I call on my Mom when I need to find something important.

Then I find it.

I call on my mom everytime I am in a pickle.

I feel her presence.

I talk to her all of the time.

In many ways  I am closer to her now.

Blessings,
Virginia

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Ask yourself.

Ask yourself.

Your real self knows.

Everything.

When we go within.

When we get silent.

When we listen.

To the nudgings.

And the knowings.

When we act on those inner voices.

The voices that seem crazy to the world.

We become free.

Everything we need to know is inside.

Go get quiet.

Blessings,

Virginia

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Ten Awesome Quotes To Inspire

Blessings ,

Virginia 

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Work With Me

 I believe we are perfect, exactly the way we are in this moment.

Often the piece missing, the big thing that we feel is lost or we can't grasp is ourselves.

What you are missing is you, perfectly wonderful you!

It is never outside of yourself.

It doesn't need fixing or need to be found.

It simply needs to have light shine on it.

That is what I do. I help shine a light on your perfection so you can live your life honoring your gifts and sharing your uniqueness with the world.

Transitions in life are stepping stones to something better. Yes, those stepping stones are a bit rough. Most growth is uncomfortable.

The real work isn't about getting the new job, or starting over after divorce, or figuring out what happens next.

                   The real work is changing your mind about yourself.

Once you have a true appreciation for who you really are, anything is possible.

Let me shine the light on you. You will be amazed at the miracles that follow.

Email me at here  for a free consultation. I look forward to hearing from you.

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Blessings,
Virginia

Love Forgives

  Love makes mistakes. Love forgives. Love never harbors guilt.

After more than 16 years and over 200,000 miles, my green queen simply died. You can read my tribute  to my beloved mini van here.

I was so excited when I bought my new Ford Focus. I named her Zippy. It was the car I had been wanting for so long!

I love driving it. I love the gas mileage. I am beyond grateful to have such a reliable vehicle. My kids know this.

My youngest recently got his license. We share Zippy. He pays a small portion of the insurance hike and is great about tossing in a few bucks of gas.

He is a great driver.

If I don't need my car, I let him take it.

He came home this morning after practice, "Mom?.."

The look on his face was horrifying.

 I thought someone had died.

"It's your car."

He hit a friend's truck backing out. There is a big old dent in the side of my car. His friend's truck has no damage.

I hugged him.

Then I said," You poor thing. You must feel horrible. It is okay. It is just a dent in a car."

He asked me why I felt sorry for him.

I shared a memory.

When he was in fourth grade I accidentally slammed the green queen's door on his hand. I was dropping off his siblings at the junior high.

 He was climbing into the front seat as I wished them off. I shut the door without even looking and then screamed when I turned back.

No bones were broken.  He got a cool cast to protect his bruised fingers.

All day at school whenever an  adult asked him about his cast, their response was, " Oh your poor mother"

He didn't get it.

I think he gets it now.

Love makes mistakes. Love forgives. Love never harbors guilt.

Blessings, 

Virginia 

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Blogs worth following

                 These five blogs are worth following.

Jackie McCormick Conn

    As the general manager of Weight Watchers in Maine, her blog is about weight loss. Yet, it is about so much more. All of her writing has a focus of you being able to achieve anything. Her voice has a  'don't ever give up'  tone. We all need that voice.

Jennifer Louden
     Do you want to create something? Jen Louden will get your creative juices flowing with more love than you could imagine. She is soo real!

Seth Godin
    He is Seth Godin. He is uber popular. His posts are extremely thought provoking. I learn something everyday from this guy.

Jon Morrow
    Want to start a blog? Read Jon's blog. He knows blogging better than anyone on the web. He is also a parapalegic. Wrap that around your head. Jon is both an inspiration and a genius.

Heather Spohr
    Heather is a mom blogger and a philanthropist. Her blogs are about her life as a mom of three. One of those three resides in heaven. Her bravery astounds me. Her ability to carry on astounds me. She is honest and full of love! Her kids are adorable!!

Blessings,

Virginia 

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Monday Course In Miracles

Nothing can hurt you unless you give it power to do so. ACIM

You do not have to pick up a rock to throw.

Or a word to sling.

You have all of the power in every situation.

When you go within.

Our true power lies inside of us.

We all have access to that power.

When we become silent.

Blessings,

Virginia

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Stop rushing and make time matter

I was running late.  I was scrambling to get to a meeting. I was rushing like a crazy woman.

Running around the corner to the steps I stubbed my toe on the book case.  I hit it with such force, I both swore and  knocked a picture to the floor.

"Ugh!! I am so late!" I said outloud as I picked the picture up.

I sat on the steps and stared at my parents as my toe began its throbbing ache. (Or was that the ache in my heart?)

In those few moments I thought about time. 

Rushing  is a waste of time.

Rushing makes us clumsy. Dealing with clumsy takes even more time.

When we do one thing at a time and 
When we are present to that one thing,
We actually become more efficient.

A meaningful life is simply made up of meaningful moments.

Rushing creates a busy life but rarely a meaningful one.

Next time you are running late:

Stop rushing.

Take a breath.

Do one thing at time.

Make each thing meaningful.

The world doesn't end if you are late to something.

Your world ends when you miss the present moment.

Blessings,
Virginia

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Things you might not know about me.

1. I am the youngest of ten.

Yes. I have nine older siblings.
Hold on to your seats.....My mom gave birth to ten children in less than eleven years.
Sometimes I try to figure the diaper thing. There were no disposable diapers back then. I cannot fathom it.
Sometimes I wonder about the mothering piece. How in the name of God did she nurture that many children??
 She did and all ten of us are pretty amazing.

2. I taught myself to ride a bike.

Duh! I have nine older siblings. We didn't have bikes.
But once one was found in the garage of a house where we lived in. My brother made it work.
I was determined!
As a fifth grader ,every day after school I would take that bike out and practice.
I would lean on the porch. I would lean on the side of the garage. I would fall so many times.
Then one day I simply soared.
And then fell down on a hill.
But I tried it again.
I can ride a bike.

3. I beat someone up .

She was bullying my friend who was helping me with my math. I told her to stop. She  poured milk over my head. I got a bit crazy and threw her across a few lunch tables.

4. I was bullied.

That whole beating up thing  lead to years of being bullied.
That bullying helped me as a parent. One of the the best blessings ever! I  talked to my kids and was real with my kids about bullying because I experienced it!

5. I had my first panic attack at 14.

Panic attacks and I are great friends. So many wonderful therapists, healers, and loved friends have helped me with this one.  I now know the pre pre pre signs. I know the preventative steps of eating well, exercising and connecting with God.
Medicine can help too. I just never chose that route.

6. My college choice was bizarre.

My Dad wanted me to check out one more. He took me to the place where he went to be a Priest. (Something I never knew.) St. Bonavetnure University. I loved it sorta.
Then there I was in the admin building after my tour and my father said, "Do you like it or not?"
I sheepishly replied, "I like it."
He paid the deposit. My college was decicded.
Best four years ever!!

7. I put myself through college.

  I got loans. I worked my butt off. I paid my own way to get a college degree. I wish this was possible for kids today. College is too expensive. My kids work and get loans and get scholarships. But the paying your own way to college is crazy. I am blessed that my kids take after me. They do what they can to pay their way. Thus, like me, they own their college experience.

7. As a waitress, I once  slipped and dropped twelve plates of food.

It was a five star establishment. I was a ninja waitress. I easily carried a tray on my shoulder with up to 15 plates. To this day, I am not sure what happened. I guess I tripped on a something.
Trout heads went flying. Linguini was everywhere.
The one hosting and paying told me it was he best show he had ever seen. And thanked me .
Best tip I ever got!

More tomorrow.

Blessings.
Virginia,

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Feng Shui Friday: Clearing Out Is All About the Baby Steps.

As you know (or don't know) one of my New Year's Resolutions was to spend 25 minutes each day clearing out.

I gave my self wiggle room. If I couldn't do 25 minutes that was okay.

The purpose of the goal was to spend some time each and every day clearing out. The each and every day mattered more than the time spent doing it. I simply cleared out each  and every day.

If we do something each and every day it becames a habit.

The doing it matters more than the time spent doing it.

So here I am 48 days of clearing something out.

It feels great.

Yes! Due to snowstorms, free hours spent shoveling and life, there are bags and boxes in my garage to be taken to various places. I am just blessing my garage as a holding place.

I love my empty spaces. I love the letting go.

Yet what I am learning most is what I already knew.

Everything happens a lttle bit at a time.

Do that little bit today!

It is all about baby steps.

Many blessings,
Virginia.


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Single Mom Thriving. I Fell in Love! With Shoveling.

I remember shoveling snow with a baby monitor and a cellphone attached to each hip.

Each time the baby monitor went wacky I would panic.

I would rush to the door, do two steps at a time and make sure all three babes were okay.

Baby monitors were a bit wacky back then.

I remember a hip high end of the driveway pile on one night of shoveling when I still carried a baby monitor. A plow driver stopped and did the job.

I remember moving here and a neighbor plowed me out at every snow storm.

I remember when that neighbor stopped plowing me out and it was once again up to me.

My kids and I did the job.

Then one went to college.

So we kicked it up another notch.

I remember when wuzband had those two and I cried in the driveway. I took breaks. Yet, I shoveled two feet of snow.

Then two went to college and us two became ninjas.

Five times shoveling in two days.

I am going out again to do the end of the driveway.

I kind of love it.

I love being outside.

I love that at 53 I can still shovel.

I love that as a single mom I can take care of my family.

I knda love shoveling.

I really love snow.!

Blessings,

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Single Mom Thriving: Advice

Take care of yourself.
As they instruct on an airplane, put your mask on before your child's.
Pamper yourself.
Your child deserves a healthy happy mom.
Get a massage, a pedicure, a manicure.
Go out with friends.
Go on dates.

This list is just a portion of advice for single moms that I have read or heard over the years.

When I read them or heard them, I didn't feel inspired. In fact, I felt downright awful.

As in, "To be happy, I have to do MORE?"

I am a firm believer in Single Moms putting themselves first and taking great care of themselves. However you can't follow someone else's recipe for happiness.

The single mom recipe for happiness can only be written by you.

Some things that helped me through the years:


* Pay close attention to your self talk. Aim to say only loving and kind things to yourself.

* You will mess up. Say kind loving things to yourself. All moms mess up. The mistake is not because you are a single mom.

* Include your children in the things you love to do. I love being outside in all weather. I spent hours on end  playing outside with my children. It refreshed me. I got my exercise. My children got their exercise and mostly we had fun.

* I taught my children at a young age that 6 am was the earliest they could get up for the day. That gave me 5-6 a.m to write and exercise.

* Dating or not dating can both be happiness boosters. You choose!

Being happy and taking excellent care of yourself is not about doing anything more. It is about enjoying what you have and being kind and loving to yourself.

If that means a massage and a manicure then go for it.. If that means a game of touch football in the yard go for it. There is no one cookie cutter happy single mom.

As the CEO of your family you choose what makes a single mom thrive.

Blesssings,
Virginia.

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Blessings,
Virginia

What is the Life Coaching Process?

                           Life Coaching Defined

 Ever wonder what happens in a life coachng session? Here is the coaching process I follow. 

This is my definition of life coaching.

The quote I stated from A Course in Miracles:

    

All of your past except it's beauty is gone and nothing is left but a blessing. ACIM

Blessings,

Virginia

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Email me here to schedule an appointment. Or call 207-361-7453

Valentine's Day: It Is Just a Choice.

On Valentine's Day we receive a magnifying glass to place over love.

Unfortunately, most of us put the magnifying glass on the wrong side.  We place the magnifier over the places where we see no love.

What we focus on becomes bigger.

So many of us feel lonely and bereft on Valentines Day.

The isolation, and sadness has nothing to do with relationship status.

Feeling sad on Valentines Day is the result of placing your magnifying glass on the wrong side of love.

When we put the magnifying glass on the love that is here:

We fall in love with the snow hanging from the branches.

We fall in love with the way the air tingles our cheeks.

We fall in love with the morning hug from a loved one.

We fall in love with life.

We fall in love with ourselves.

So which side of love are you going to place your  magnifying glass today?

The place where there is no love or the place of the love that is already here?

It is simply a choice.

Happy Valentine's Day

With Love,
Virginia

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Monday's Course In Miracles

          God is the light in which I see. ACIM

Somewhere within us there is a light.

Even when we can barely see it.

Or not see it at all.

If we trust the light is there.

We will know it.

And then we will see it.

Blessings,

Virginia

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Winter Storm Orson and Bombogenesis ,This SIngle Mom's Got It !

Winter storm Orson is here. It may be a Bombogenesis. (Love that word! Really.. think of it's etymology. Without even doing research you get it!)

At every pending snowstorm an anxiety sets right smack in my solar plexus.

My breathing gets a bit shallow.

I get into action. I get gas for the generator. I get food. I get water. I line up extension cords for the generator. I fill the tub so we can flush.

I get scared.

After all of these years as a single mom...
After living through, shovelling through, hotelling it through more snowstorms than I can count. I still do it.

I still get scared.

Today I made friends with that scared.

That scared is about me NOT being in charge of all  things.

That scared is  teaching me to be at peace with the unknown.

Maybe we will lose power. Maybe we won't. Either way I trust I will be okay.

I told my Orson, Bombogenesis worries to a dear married  friend today.

Her response went something like this... I think I would love going into this storm with a 6'2,  210 pounds of muscle on my team.

My youngest at home is just that.

So scared and I are now friends.

I am feeling blessed to have help.

We finished round one of shoveling.

Most impotantly I no longer lose power. Regardless of electricity.

Blessings,
Virginia
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I Am An Introvert Who Loves People.

I am an introvert who loves people. What a crazy statement.

It is true. I am an introvert . I love people 

I love hearing stories. Our  stories are so fascinating.

I love my work as a life coach. I am wonderful at listening ,and sharing love. (I love my job!!)

Yet people exhaust me.

Loud ,busy crowded spaces make me nauseous and dizzy.

I spent my entire Saturday at my son's wrestling meet.

I felt dizzy and light headed when first entering.

I know I am not the only introvert who sometimes needs to be in a crowded room.

So Here is what helps

1. Create a centering mantra.

2. Bring a book.

3. Connect with one person.

4. Have an exit.

5. Find things to appreciate.

6. Make up stories about people.

7. Help.

8. Move any part of your body.

9. Write.

10. Play on your phone. (This is my least favorite. Yet I have done it to to distract me from the chaos.)

Be grateful you are an introvert. The world needs more of us!

Blessings

Virginia

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Feng Shui Friday: The Letting Go Of Stuff.

A few years back I got a dumpster. You can read it here.

It was invigorating. It was life changing.

I felt like I threw my children's childhood away.

So it was also sad.

In my 25 minute nightly cleanout, I have assigned places to gift my buckets and buckets of Legos.

Yet another example of me throwing my children's childhood away.

Today, at lunchtime, I snow shoed in the woods behind my house.  I suddenly became 12 year old me.  I was exploring. I was feeling a tad bit lost. I was in love with nature. I was 12 .

Yes my mom tossed all of my stuffed animals. My mom saved nothing from my childhood.

Yet I remembered.

I remembered the me without stuff.

The stuff just doesn't matter.

What matters is the essence of who we were, are and always will be.

I can not ever throw away my children's childhood. Their childhood lives in their hearts. 

Hearts that will be beating way beyond mine.

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Blessings ,
Virginia

Let's Make Curiosity Our New Mantra

" I think at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift would be CURIOSITY."  Eleanor Roosevelt

Let's just be curious.

Curious about our emotions.

Curious about other people's actions.

Curious about politics.

Curious creates a pause.

A moment to breathe.

A moment to widen the gap. Watch more on widenting the gap here. and here

Thanks for watching.

Keep being curious this week.

Many Blessings,

Virginia

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Scared is Sacred

A client ended her story with, " I am f**'n scared"

My response, "Of course you are f**n scared."

Silence.

Then she said, "I don't want to be scared."

Me, "But you are f**n scared, so let's start there."

I could not ask this lovely woman to feel anything else other than scared. With Love as my guide, I could not tell her how great her life was, how much she had to be grateful for, or that everything will work out. She was F**n scared. None of those words would have meant anything.

The only way to the other side of scared is to feel scared.

What is scared?

If you switch just two letters you get sacred.

Scared is sacred.

Scared is sacred because in our scariest times we call on something bigger than ourselves .

We call on God, universe, spirit or just yell HELP as we sob on the floor.

Rumi said the the wound  is where the light enters you.

The light comes in when we let ourselves be scared.

When the light comes the sacred begins.

"I don't want to be scared" becomes

"I have a team of helpers."
"I do have some things to be grafteful for"
"There are great things in my life"
"I am going to be okay"

Blessings,
Virginia

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Monday's Course In Miracles.

I am a student of the Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from The Course.

This is not a course you take once.

I have been at it for close to eight years.

I highly recommend it to anyone who wants to see the world differently.

I highly recommend The Course In Miracles to anyone who wants more love in their lives.

Go check it out here.

I'll tell you more next week.

The Course In Miracles does that.

It gives you baby steps.

Remember this.

You are loved!

Many Blessings,
Virginia

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I Was Raised Catholic. My Church is in Nature.

I was raised Catholic.

Each and every Sunday all 12 McCormacks would march into a pew.

I remember playing 'push the knee off the kneeler'  with my brother Michael. A game where we would knock knees and try to make the other one's knee slam on the floor.

While standing we would knock elbows. Same game, different body part.

We had to do this with out laughing. Oh my goodness! Trying NOT to laugh at Sunday Mass was the worst!

I was a serious, pensive kid. Yet at Mass I simply wanted to giggle. Or make my brother giggle outloud so he would get in trouble instead of me.

I went to a Catholic elementary school. My second grade teacher, Sr. Monice, taught all ten McCormack kids.

In high school I became very active in a Catholic retreat group.

I went to a Catholic University.

My room mate and I at St. Bonas used to go to Mass before Happy Hour on most Fridays.

I was married in a Catholic Church. I served in parish ministry. I served Communion.  All of my babes were baptized. I continued going to Mass every Sunday.

Then I stopped.

It may have been The Boston Globe's impeccable investigative reporting.  Please watch Spotlight.

It may have been a priest refusing me communion because I chose to divorce my husband.

It may have been a new church refusing me to homeschool my children in religious education.

The priests on the list that the Boston Globe posted.. some were in and out of my home when I was a kid. I simply didn't trust the Catholic church with my kids.

So I stopped going to Mass.

Having faith has never ended.

I know there is a great God. I know Mary. I know Jesus.

Most importantly I know LOVE.

And I find it here.

Whatever your faith, your upbringing, your stuff. Never forget love is here always!

Go outside!

Blessings,
Virginia

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An Anniversary..of Divorce

On February 4, 2005 I was filled with hope.

February 4, 2005  my divorce was finalized.

After five years of knowing.

After five years of turning over every rock.

After trying and trying to make it work..for the children.

After thinking I simply cannot lose my mom to Altzeimers and my husband at the same time.

I just turned direction.

I got in the direction of LOVE.

I felt great on February 4, 2005.

On that day I woke with my three lovlings sprawled all over my bed.

We read in my bed and I fell asleep.

I woke to a window version of winter wonderland.

 In my sacred vision the snow looked like the wedding dress my mom made for me.(The same mom that didnot know who I was.)

It was a weird day.

It was a happy day.

It was a sad day.

It was one of the happiest days of my life!

Blessings ,
Virginia

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Feng Shui Friday: The Five Elements and the Bagua Map

Last week, I wrote about the five elements, wood, fire, earth, metal and water. You can read it here.

If you have been following my Feng Shui thread, you know about the bagua map.

The bagua map shows us which parts of our homes represent life themes.

By placing the map at the front entrance to your home you can figure out how each area of your home matches each gua (life theme).

Each gua also has an earth element.  By adding an earth element you can enhance the gua.

Abundant Blessings:  Wood

Fame and Reputation: Fire

Love and Marriage: Earth

Elders: Wood

Health Center: Earth

Creativity and Children Metal

Knowledge and Self Cultivation: Earth

Journey and Career: Water

Helpful People Heaven: Metal

As you add these elements remember to get rid of anything you don't love, don't need or don't use.

And as always, remember Feng Shui is pronounced FUN Shway. Have fun making your home a mirror of your beautiful life.

Want more? Sign up on the top right for your free Feng Shui E book.

Blessings,

Virginia

Single Mom Thriving:Alternative Facts Are Just False.

  

The alternative facts about a single mom have always astounded me. This is a short list of some of the real truths about us single moms. It is a list based on my own experience as well as the hundreds of single moms I have coached, friended and adored.

1. We are not taking advantage of the 'system'. If a fair system actually existed, all single mothers would receive fair and timely child support.

2. Those of us who received (or are receiving) government assistance are ashamed. We are mothers who swallowed great pride to care for our children.

3. Many of us were turned down from government assistance, food pantries and church donations. Oh dear God, the stories I have heard on the why to this one would make your spine shiver.  It could be an entire blog post. Suffice to say, even the so called 'do gooders' have judgements about single moms.

4. Being turned down was okay. We single moms know how to build a tribe. Safety nets are built of friends who love us. They love us because single moms love fiercely.

5. We are not lazy! I invite you to take a group of children (or even just one) 24/7 while they all have the flu. Just as they are recovering you get it. Then talk to me about lazy.

6. Married moms, I have yet to meet a great single mom who is interested in sleeping with someone else's husband. Look back at #5. We are tired!! Stop worrying.

7. Married moms ,we do ,however, so appreciate when your husband shows up to help. The last snow storm, my client's neighbor (married guy) snow blowed her driveway. My single mom client was doing #5. Two kids puking every hour . #4, Amen

8. Kids raised by single moms do not live a life of doom. Most are very normal. Most are very loved!

9. Kids being raised by single moms get on the honor roll, get in the school play, get to excell at sports, get scholarships, get into great colleges just like everyone else. Let's stop thinking a kid raised by a single mom is destined to anything less than great.

10. Kids being raised by single moms....One became the best President this nation has ever seeen. Thank you  President Obama for showing us single moms that our kids can be as great as you!

Blessings,

Virginia

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Let's Play More

When was the last time you played?

Be honest. How many of your free, precious 24 hours in a day, have been spent in the swirl of politics?

I am not talking about the calling and the emailing of Senators. I am also not talking about the marching.

I am talking about the Facebook feed, the internet suck, and the netflix, TV, food (name your vice) numb.

Let's Play More!

We all know play is how children learn.

We adults still need learning.

When was the last itme you played?

After I shot this video, I learned once again that these woods have swamps. My foot got submerged. I laughed.

Laughing, alone in the woods, feeling like a kid, was simply awesome!!

Lets play more!!

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Blessings,
Virginia