Mondays Course In Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying A Course In Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

The Light Has Come. ACIM

Single Mom Thriving: Get the Basket Off Of Your Head.


Many years ago my new dryer stopped working.

I decided I couldn't afford to get the dryer fixed.

I had the Poor Single Mom basket on my head.

For six years I hung clothes outside in nice weather and around the house in the winter. Early morning hanging, early evening taking in, shake off bugs, rush outside in a rain storm was my life in the nice weather. Hanging clothes on curtain rods, chair backs, tables,  a clothes line in the kitchen and a home made clothes rack was my my life in the winter.

For. Six. Years.

Finally I took off the basket of poverty thinking and I found someone to fix my dryer. It cost me 75 dollars.

75 Dollars!

I love my dryer. Every time I pull those warm clothes out I feel so grateful. Sometimes I even miss the days of hanging them all over the place.

Yet each time I fold clothes I remind myself that there is no need for a basket over my head.

Abundance  prevails.















What Are You Receiving?



Late last year a long held dream came to fruition and I was simply overcome with gratitude. I was walking around  in utter amazement of my good fortune and I simply couldn't say thank you enough.

In my state of awe, a dear friend said to me, " You need to receive better. You are acting as if you don't deserve this."

What?

As we delved deeper into the meaning behind her words I knew she was right. Being grateful was the mask of my perceived unworthiness.

A Course in Miracles states that giving and receiving are one. We receive what we are giving and we give what we receive. There is no mention of gratitude.

It is important to be grateful but sometimes our state of gratitude is so giant that we forget we are deserving of all good.

One Christmas when I was little I made gifts for my nine siblings and my parents. I was so excited about those gifts.  As each family member opened their present I got a smile and a thank you. That was it. I felt so sad. I wanted a more excited reaction. My gifts weren't received, even though they each said thank you ever so politely.

God must feel the same.  We list  thank yous in journals and on our Facebook feed. We smile and say thank you to compliments. But do we really receive the gifts?

I invite you to stop and ask yourself, "What am I receiving right now?"

And next time you receive a gift, even one that is not wrapped in shiny paper, allow yourself to savor it before you rush into gratitude.

Monday's Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying A Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

Humility will never ask that you remain content with littleness. ACIM

Feng Shui Friday: The Bathroom



The bathroom often gets a bad rap in Feng Shui because of all of the drains and the sayings like "There's money flushed down the toilet."

However, I prefer to see the bathroom as a temple to self care. It is in the bathroom that we are most vulnerable and it is a place to bring reverence to your body and soul.

Promise to hold your self care as sacred.

*In your journal answer these questions:
   How do I care for and speak (self talk especially) about my body?
   How do I present myself to the world?
   What beliefs are holding me back?

*Some enhancements for the bathroom to try:

        Start with an intention: My body is my temple.

        Make the room beautiful by adding fresh flowers, candles and plants.
        Invest in fluffy luxurious towels.
         Keep the toilet seat closed.
         Keep it clutter free.
        Bring in reminders of the purity and goodness yourself.

When you take showers or baths imagine all negative energy and old beliefs that are holding you back going right down the drain.
 
   Remember Feng Shui is pronounced FUN Shway. Have fun making your home a mirror to your wonderful life.

Blessings,
Virginia

How to Forgive.



Forgive and Forget.

Is that really possible when you have been hurt by someone you love?

Forgiveness used to frighten me. I thought that if I forgave, I was somehow being weak. Only when I understood what forgiveness  is NOT  could I receive it's gift.

Forgiveness is not condoning or even accepting the behavior of the person who hurt us.
Forgiveness doesn't mean we will never have feelings about the the situation.
Forgiveness doesn't mean we will forget.
Forgiveness doesn't even involve the other person.

Forgiveness can only happen after we have delved into our feelings around the hurt. Often times that delving involves a therapist, a coach, or a trusted friend.

Forgiveness starts as a willingness and in time leads to no longer being a victim of our circumstances.

Forgiveness has nothing to do with the other person and everything to do with you. Once you have forgiven you are free from those dark feelings of revenge and bitterness and resentment. Once you have forgiven you can look ahead to a brighter future.

One of my favorite prayers:
   "Dear God, Help me to forgive. Help me to see love and not fear."




Monday's Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying A Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all of the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. ACIM

Why Hire a Life Coach?

Why Hire A Life Coach?

Sometimes the road is a bit unclear and the vastness can be scary.   Where you want to go seems so far away from where you are.  As a coach I help you stay present , while holding you accountable for the steps you choose to take.

You are the expert of your life. I believe you intuitively know where you want to go and only need someone to guide you. My underlying philosophy is that all you want is within your reach.  I help you elicit  solutions and  uncover your potential for greatness.

Life feels uncomfortable and you are done with the many masks of life. You are committed to travel the road as you, perfectly wonderful you.

I help you design your future instead of getting over your past. We all have pasts. We all have scars and hurts. That is part of life. While some of your behaviors and thoughts and feeling  stem from past hurts, you want to move forward to the journey back to yourself.

Circumstances can create an abrupt change.  You might be looking at a life that is nothing like you planned. Nothing happens by accident . The hurt is real but there is always a gift in the rubble. I help you uncover the gifts and recreate your life.

Why hire a life coach?
    Because even though the future looks a bit scary and your past a bit flawed, you are ready to make NOW the present that it is.

I would love to travel with you. Email me here to schedule a free consultation.


why hire a life coach

Monday's Course In Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying A Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

       Love created me like itself. ACIM


Stop Searching and Start Discovering

I send my clients an intake questionnaire before our initial meeting.

One of the questions is:  What do you want to get out of coaching?

The number one answer: " I want to find my life purpose."

I respond (in session) "Where did you lose it?"

I get it. We all want to live purposeful lives. We all want that feeling of accomplishment and to feel that our being here matters. However you just can't go looking for that like you do a lost set of keys.

Your purpose never got lost. You did!

Your purpose is to be right where you are in this moment.  Let's all stop looking any farther.

I found that when I gave up the search, my life became more meaningful. Even washing dishes became purposeful.

We don't need to find a life purpose. We need to discover all of our gifts that are already here.




Blessings,
Virginia

Feng Shui Friday; The Bedroom

The three most important guas in your home are the entryway, the kitchen and your bedroom.
You can find the entryway post here and the kitchen post here.

      Your bedroom is your haven from the world and the most intimate room of your home.
You spend at least a third of your life in this room resting, romancing and rejuvenating. Yet many people treat the bedroom as an after thought because guests don't see it. 

*In your journal write the answers to these questions:
     * How rested do I feel?
     * How is my relationship with my partner? (Or if single) Am I wanting to attract a new partner?
     * How do I feel when I walk into my bedroom?

*Always start with an intention, "I feel rejuvenated and romanced each and every day."

*Try some of these enhancements

        Keep it as clean as possible.

        Make your bed each and every day.

        The colors should be warm and cozy as opposed to bright and flashy.

        Exercise equipment, televisions, computers don't belong in here. If that is impossible, cover them with pretty material or a screen. You don't want to be able to see any of these items from your bed.

        Pictures of your children or family members, other than your significant other, don't belong in your bedroom either. 

        Invest in a beautiful bed and the highest count sheets you can afford.

                      You want to wake up and fall asleep seeing something beautiful.



Single Mom Thriving: The Coaching Process

The number one issue that leads single moms to me is overwhelm.

Overwhelm was a constant companion of mine for many years. How I handled it, and how I teach other single moms to handle overwhelm is a three step process.

1. Shine the light on the shame, fear and unworthiness that, as single moms we often feel.

Stuffing those feelings down only creates more overwhelm. Shining light on them, letting them just be there helps to loosen their grip on you.  We shine light on feelings by talking about them, naming them, drawing them ,even dancing them. They never really go away but when they come up they don't scare us.

2. Shifting your mindset.

When I first got divorced, the label single mom brought up visions of poverty, and feelings of worthlessness.  So I changed my new identity from single mom to CEO of my family. That  one shift made all of the difference. Changing your mind about yourself is the most loving act you could give yourself and your family.

3. Creating an action plan

Once you have a recipe for dealing with the raw emotions and a new way of seeing yourself in the world, you are ready to create a solid action plan of moving ahead with your life. The action plan is of your making but it includes a regimen of excellent self care.

It is such an honor to witness the transformation of my fellow single mom CEO's.

Blessings,
Virginia





Tuesday's Tips :



When I go through my pictures each week and  stumble across a picture of me as a little girl, I put it on my desk. Seeing the little girl, that is still very much a part of me, reminds me to treat myself like a small child.

* I would never demean a small child. I would only say positive things to her.  Even if she made a mistake, I would treat her with loving care.
                               
                               The picture reminds me to only use loving self talk.
           
 *I truly believe that children need to be in  the fresh air each and every day.  When my children were smaller most of our time was spent outside. Now that they are older, I can forget that I still need to get outside.
                                           The picture reminds me to get outside.

*For children playing is their natural way of being in the world.
                                   The picture reminds me to have fun and be silly.

* Children know how to eat. As a parent I always make sure there is plenty of yummy food to eat whenever my children are hungry. When I am stressed, I can forget to eat.
                                              The picture reminds me to eat.

*I function best with 8 or 9 hours of sleep. I would never deprive a child of a good night's sleep.
                                         The picture reminds me to go to bed on time.

Most of all the picture reminds me that I deserve to be treated with the utmost care and it is up to adult me to do just that.