Feng Shui Friday

I teach courses on Feng Shui and I also incorporate it in my coaching practice and in my own home. It is a wonderful tool in creating a more tranquil and enjoyable life. I am dedicating Friday's blog to all things Feng Shui.

This is the third week of the nine week Bagua Map course. The Bagua map shows where the nine areas (guas) are located in your home.Each week I will give you tips on how to enhance one of the guas in your life in each area of your home. This week I will cover Abundant Blessings.

The abundance blessings area, often referred to as the money corner, isn't all about money. It is located in the far left area of your home and it is about being grateful for all of your blessings. I like to refer to this gua as the gratitude area. What we are grateful for expands.

Ways to enhance this area;
*Always start with cleaning and decluttering.
*Pictures and objects that symbolize abundance to you.
*A fountain or picture of raging water.
*The color purple or gold.

My gratitude area is outside due to a screened porch and deck that juts out of the back middle of my house. I marked the corner with a bird feeder. I   love watching the birds from my kitchen window. Right now there is an abundance of snow.

I have a garden overflowing with tiger lilies under all of that snow.

When you have an area outside, it is important to enhance the adjacent room's area.  Right now my fruit art is in the far left in my kitchen. Now that is some yummy grateful abundance !

Have fun! Remember Feng Shui is pronounced FUN Shway. Enjoy making your home a mirror of your wonderful life.

Blessings,

Virginia

Monday Course In Miracles

Nothing can hurt you unless you give it power to do so. ACIM

You do not have to pick up a rock to throw.

Or a word to sling.

You have all of the power in every situation.

When you go within.

Our true power lies inside of us.

We all have access to that power.

When we become silent.

Blessings,

Virginia

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I Spent This Week Wasted.

I wasted a lot of time.

I got scared. So I over did the internet news search.

I reacted. So I read, posted and shared a crazy amount of things on social media.

I wanted numb. So I binged on Netflix.

I gave fear the time I could have been creating and loving.

No more.

I have a new plan.

1. I am only paying attention to two  news sources I trust, NPR and The Washington Post. (There are many more I trust I just limited myself to two)

2. I will do one thing a day to make this world better. This change is a marathon not a sprint. One thing is enough. 
              Imagine if we all just did one thing. 

3. My one thing will be decided the night before. Then I will schedue it.

4. Social media happens after I have created and loved.

Let's make this time a love fest and stop being wasted!

Blessings,
Virginia

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Pay Attention to The War in Your Head.

I felt like I was going to throw up.

Then I wanted to cry.

Or scream.

Or break something.

This country is screwed. So many people won't have health insurance. My daughter has lost her reproductive rights.  Why couldn't he have said kinder and  less devisive words. Who in their right mind voted for him? People are going to be deported. There is going to be a nuclear war.

My thoughts swirled from bad to worse and on and on and on. I felt angrier by the minute.

Then I stopped.

I was folding laundry.

I felt like I was going to throw up.

Then I wanted to cry.

Or scream.

Or break something.

I am never going to be able to do this. How will I ever do it when they are teenagers? How will I afford college? What was I thinking? What if we end up homeless? What if they become horrible people? It will be all my fault.

My thoughts went from bad to worse.

Then I stopped.

Three children under ten were happily entertaining themselves in the back of an overpacked van. I was driving us to our new home.

 A Course In Miracles states:

 "At Peace I ask for nothing and have everything. At war I ask for everything and have nothing." 

I believe the biggest war is the war in our head.

That war requires people to behave as we want them to.

That war requires us to be able see the future.

That war invents horrible outcomes.

When you are at war in your mind you have nothing and you ask for everything.

When you soften, even just a bit, you get peace.

I am not encouraging us to be lazy. I am not encouraging us to slap on a happy face and a happy affirmation and go hide under a rock.

When we give ourselves a moment of peace we are inspired to act.

If I had stayed in my pissed off mood over the weekend, I could not have made intelligent phone calls to my senators these past two days.

If I had stayed in that singlemom freak out mode, who would have raised my children?

It is all normal. We all do it. ALL. OF. THE. TIME.

In fact I've spoken about it here.

The trick is to catch ourselves, laugh, and get back to what is real.

Blessings,
Virginia

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We Widen the Gap to Remember.

We widen the gap to remember our essence is peace and love. Let's all spend time in that gap.

Thanks for watching.

Thanks for infusing your love into this world.


Blessings,
Virginia

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Widen the Gap. Meditation

Many of the 'experts' encourage meditation for weight loss, securing a new job, finding a new love, becoming healthier and achieving all of your dreams.

I think they got it all wrong.

I am not a meditation teacher.

I do however meditate everyday.

There really isn't anything fancy about it. I light a candle.  I sit on the rug. I set an alarm. I breathe and I bring all of my attention to my breath for ten minutes.

Today it went something like this:

I 'm hungry. I wish I had eaten first.

Back to my breath.

I wonder how E is doing.

Back to my breath.

The inauguration.

Back to my breath.

Trump.

Back to my breath.

For ten minutes thoughts come as I meditate but I let them go and keep refocusing on my breathing.

 In his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Steve Covey writes of the space between stimulus (something that has happened) and response. This is the space where our freedom lies.

Meditation has made that gap wider for me.  If something occurs I am much better at making a choice before I respond.

I am human. I still forget the gap. I sometimes have responses that are NOT loving.

Yet  knowing that space is always there for me is amazingly freeing.

I meditate to widen the gap around my feelings so I have more freedom to choose my thoughts, moods and actions.

Meditation is not the quick fix to any perceived problems.

There are no quick fixes to anything.

Meditation is simply a tool to widen the gap so we respond better to what we are presented with.

Try it!

Sit for ten minutes.  Focus on your breathing. As each thought comes up let it be and get right back to your breathing focus.

Let's all widen the gap.

Blessings,
Virginia

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Getting Organized; A Spiritual Practice Part Two

Organizing your week and your day is a spiritual practice. Your days matter.

Last Sunday I wrote about how I plan for my week. You can read it here.

I do a version of the same thing every day.

I believe reflection helps us to know ourselves better.

There is nobody better to know than yourself.

At the end of my work day I spend 10-15 minutes reflecting.

Who did I touch in a positive way today?
What exactly did I get done?
Did I procrastinate? If so, how can I make friends with that fear? (Procrastination  is just fear.)
When did I feel great today?
Did I stick to my schedule?
What did I learn?
Is there anything I want to change for tomorrow?

Then I look at tomorrow's schedule. I tweak anything I can to make sure I feel successful.

 I don't care what you do for work. Through that work you are sharing yourself with the world. Our world, more than ever, needs someone who is reflecting.

Our world needs YOU reflecting on how YOU make this world a better place each and every day!

Thank you!

Many blessings,
Virginia

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Enough!

I was blessed to share a day with a friend I haven't seen in over  12 years.

We were talking careers and money.

I said I made enough. I said this with a bit of shame.

Her response, "Enough is better than an excess."

Since then I have been thinking about enough.

Webster's definition of enough "occurring in such quantity, quality or scope as to fully meet demands, needs or expectations."

Brene Brown wowed the world with her Power of Being Enough.

Enough is perfect. Enough is you. Enough is me.

If you have enough count yourself blessed.

I sure do.

Blessings,
Virignia

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An Easy Way To Feel Good

I have read copious amounts of books and articles from the world's greatest teachers about the importance of feeling good. I am a natural Pollyanna. I have a knack for turning lemons into lemonade.

I spend many billable hours encouraging women to find creative ways to feel good inside regardless of what is going on in the outside world. Naturally one would think I had the feeling good way of life down pat.

Well I don't.

Life has her way of turning events and throwing us all curveballs. I am no exception to the rule.

This one curve ball had me REALLY sad. Being kind to myself helped. Dancing around the kitchen helped. Praying helped. Getting in nature helped. Exercising, eating well and getting more sleep helped. However, I still couldn't totally shake it. I felt like I was in a dark cloud and my heart was heavy.

Finally I decided to change my quest to feel good into something totally different. Instead of feeling good I decided to DO good. I made it my daily goal to do a good deed for someone else.

And as life would have it, DOING good lead to FEELING good.

Next time life throws you a curve ball,  treat yourself with tender care.  Then do something good for someone else.

You'll be the happier for it. I promise.
Blessings,
Virginia

Use Your Mindset To Achieve Your New Year Goals.

Your mindset can help you achieve your new years goal and every goal throughout the year.

We could spend millions of dollars to help us achieve our new year goal.

However, if we don't utilize our most treasured resource, all of that money will be wasted.

Our most treasured resource is between our ears.

Achieving anything requires paying attention to our thoughts, our words and our perception.

Here is a quick way to do just that.

Blessings,

Virginia


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Journal Writing Prompts: 25 Questions to Ask Yourself.

I encourage all of my clients to keep a journal. Many get stuck because they don't know what to write. So here is a list of qustions to ask yourself next time you grab a notebook and a pen.


1.What do you want?

2.What do you really really want?

3.Why do you want it?

4.If you had this thing how would you feel?

5.What is the most loving thing someone has done for you?What is the most loving thing you have done for someone else?

6. What would be a perfect day for you? Describe it using all of your senses.

7.Is there something you might regret not doing by the end of your life?

8.What were you like as a small child?

9.What are some of your favorite childhood memories?

10.If you had a magic wand, what would you magically change in your life?

11.What is something you do everyday?

12.What would you tell your ten year younger self?

13.What is an important lesson you have learned?

14.What is a blessing you received from your mother?

15.What is a blessing you received from your father?

16.Who do you admire and why?

17.Imagine yourself next year at this time, what does your life look like?

18.Five years from now?

19.Ten years from now?

20.What did you want to grow up to be when you were a child?

21.What was your first best friend like?

22. Who was your favorite teacher and why?

23. What is amazing in your life right now?

24. What are 100 things in your life that you are grateful for?

25. If you could only use positive attributes, how would you describe yourself?


What questions would you ask yourself? Let me know in the comments.

Blessings,

Virginia

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Monday A Course In Miracles

Five Ways To Get Back On Track With Your Goal

 I decided I wanted to be stronger. So I added some more to my weight training and put some more umph in to my runs.

I was feeling good. I was on track.

One day while doing burpees my shoulder gave out.

I injured this shoulder years back raking the roof. It was a painful injury that took months to heal.

I freaked out. I thought of every worst scenario possible. I told myself I was too old to get stronger. I told myself I had another six month healing time. I told myself I should not have even bothered.

I told myself what we all tell ourselves when a goal gets siderailed: I told myself it was time to quit.

Then I laughed at myself.

I got the ice and the advil.

I babied myself a bit.  I iced my shoulder with an episode of Gilmore Girls.

Then I rewired my brain.

This is just a twist in the road. I can still achieve my goal.

 I found other ways to meet my goal of being stronger. I kept running. I worked my lower body. I started some balancing exercises.

Reaching a goal is never linear. Curve balls happen.

When the curve ball comes..

1. Let's laugh at our crazy thoughts. Especially the one that says quit

2. Let's simply do the most logical next step.

3. Let's love ourselves.

4. Let's change our minds.

5. Let's find more creative ways to move towards our goal.

Happy to say my shoulder is fine.  I am however doing a lighter version of a burpee.

Blessings,
Virginia

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Watch On Wednesdays. Creating Change :Step One

              Without change there would be no butterflies.


Change in our lives is inevitable. Sometimes we long for it. Othertimes it is gifted to us. Either way, change is rarely comfortable.

I have created a video series to help you navigate changes that are happening in your life.

Enjoy!

Blessings,
Virginia

Watch On Wednesday: Toddler Care is Self Care

It is another Watch on Wednesday. Enjoy.

Treat yourself as you would a child. You deserve it.

Be sure to sign up on the top right hand box. I have some exciting offerings only for my email community.

Many Blessings,
Virginia

Meet Virginia

Hi there I'm Virginia McCormack, a single mom of three, a life coach, a writer and a teacher.

I started this blog to inspire women to live life on their terms. I believe we all have unique gifts to offer the world.

I write four or five times a week on spirituality,Feng Shui and thriving as a single mom. My goal is that you find something here that resonates with your soul and leads you to knowing your absolute perfection.

Here is a sample of my most read posts:

Stop Searching and Start Discovering

What Should I Do?

Single Mom Thriving.

Friday's Feng Shui: Start with the Clutter;Ten Tricks

Ways To Be Brave



I have been working with women and families for over 25 years as a teacher, counselor, home school coordinator, writer, life coach and career counselor.

I earned my Master's Degree in Counseling from The University of Southern Maine.

I earned my Bachelors Degree in Communications from St. Bonaventure University.

I also post daily inspirations on instagram as well as some other fun stuff on Facebook.

Here's my facebook welcome

Hope to hear from you.

Many Blessings,
 Virginia

Single Mom Thriving and Surviving Mother's Day

I wrote this piece six years ago and I thought I would recycle it on my blog to honor all single mothers this Mothers Day.  Mother's Day really is about being with your children.

                               This is the picture that went with the article. Talk about TBT!

                                           
                                                             Just Mom

Like all single mothers I figured out immediately that the buck stopped with me. If something needed to be done, I figured it out.  Holidays were no different. In spite of Hallmark's incessant reminders that my family looked different, I went into each holiday determined to celebrate joy.

I figured out Christmas trees and Christmas lights. I stayed up all night one Christmas eve putting together a "some assembly required" pool table. I enjoyed buying my own presents, filling my own Easter basket and even buying my own valentine. I was proud that I knew how to honor and cherish myself regardless of my marital status.

Then Mothers day happened and all I felt was sad and sorry for myself. While millions of mothers were being pampered by their children with their husbands' assistance, my children were panic stricken as how to honor me. I missed my mom terribly and was envious of all the moms enjoying brunch, flowers and no housework.

No matter how hard I tried I couldn't bring myself to enjoy Mother's Day. I would have preferred to skip the entire day all together.

But for my children's sake I can do anything, even get a grip on Mother's Day.  It took time to master the day and it will never be my favorite, but joy can be found.

First I give myself to full permission to feel sad, resentful, angry or even jealous on Mother's Day. Feelings come up all of the time allowing them to be there makes them go away.

Secondly, my children feel enormous pressure on Mothers Day and it is difficult for them to create a perfect day without the help of another adult. I take all of the pressure off by assuring them I only want a hand made card and they include a breakfast in bed.

I also ask my children for alone time in my garden where I can be with my mom. Each year I plant something in  memory of my mom on Mothers Day.

Permission to feel, breakfast in bed,handmade cards, time alone in my garden with my mom are all the mothers day festivities I want. The rest of the day is about being a family and spending time with my three favorite people, the ones who gave me the honorable title of Mom.

Baby Steps

Take the step !

You might fall.

You might look silly.

People might say mean things.

You will be afraid.

You might want to vomit.

Take the step anyways with as much conviction as a baby learning to walk. 

You got this! 

Blessings ,

Virginia

Planting Seeds

On a beautiful 60 degree Sunday in March. I decided to garden. The soil was workable. So I added  compost and planted lettuce, arugula, spinach, onions and snap peas.

I planted seeds in March, in Maine.

I felt like a rock star. I felt like a miracle had occurred.

Until..

We got not one, not two, but three more snowfalls and temperatures dropped to below freezing

At the first snowfall I thought, "I should have known better than to plant so early. Maybe they will survive."

At the second snowfall I thought "Oh how stupid!  Planting all of those veggies in March. You live in Maine."

By the third snowfall I just laughed and remembered how much fun I had on that warm late March day.

Planting seeds is never a mistake. Sometimes we are in such a hurry for results we plant seeds when the time isn't right. The seeds are just reflections of what we want to grow in our lives.

Mistakes happen. We try new things and sometimes they don't work out. I had no idea we were going to have  three early spring snowfalls. I could have speculated, but I was right there in the moment doing what I love to do.

Being in the moment takes courage and living from your heart often involves setbacks. But that doesn't mean we should give up. I am certainly not going to give up gardening just because of that one mistake.

I replanted my early vegetable seeds just the other day.

Just as I replanted seeds in my heart in my morning meditation.

I trust both the garden in my heart and the garden in my yard will bloom.

Inspiration From a Mud Puddle

I take a picture everyday as a way to help me look at the world in a more loving way.  I often take pictures in my own yard because in the words of Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz,

If I ever go looking for my heart's desire again I won't look further than my back yard because if it isn't there I never really lost it to begin with.

 My back yard picture was NOT inspiring. In fact it was quite depressing.

Then I adjusted my looking and my picture came out as this:

                             How we choose to see things makes all the difference in the world.

We all have mud puddles in our lives and every moment isn't always sunshine and roses.However even in the ugliness we can choose to find beauty right where we are.

                           Even mud puddles can be gorgeous we when look at them differently.