Invite Every One Of Your Emotions In

The Law of Attraction can seem to propose that a bad mood equals disaster.

Nothing could be further than the truth.

Emotions are what makes us human. Disaster happens when we judge, stuff down or feel ashamed of negative emotions.

I prefer to treat emotions as Rumi speaks of in this poem:

The Guesthouse

This being human is a guest house.
every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house of all of its furniture
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice
meet them all at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes
because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.

Jelaluddin Rumi Translated by Coleman Barks




Meet them all at the door laughing and invite them in


Anxiety is my trigger emotion. I cannot leave it unattended. Ignoring it brings me right smack into the dungeon of shame.  I have learned to welcome and laugh with anxiety as soon as it creeps into my solar plexus.

After taking a few deep healing breaths, I lovingly say, "Well hello Glob (I named it) here you are again."

From there I have

* Written letters to the Glob.

*Asked the Glob what it needed to teach me.

*Drawn the Glob and named it.

* Danced what if felt like to have the Glob.

* And then danced as if the anxiety was gone.

Like all storms, the anxiety dissipates.  Then the anxiety becomes something to be grateful for.

Emotions are not anything to fear.

They just are.

Welcome them all!

Blessings,
Virginia

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Monday's Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying the Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

Every decision you make stems from what you think you are, and represents the value that you put upon yourself .  ACIM

Monday's Course In Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying the Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

I feel the Love of God within me now. ACIM

Friday's Feng Shui

I teach courses on Feng Shui and I also incorporate it in my coaching practice and in my own life. It is a wonderful tool in creating a more tranquil life.

This is the seventh of the nine lesson Bagua Map Course. The bagua map shows where the nine areas of your life (guas)  are located in your home. Each lesson I give you tips on how to enhance one of the guas. This week I will cover Helpful People Heaven.

The Helpful People and Heaven area refers to the help we receive in times of need. Angels sent  straight from heaven always surround us and show up every time we ask.   Enhance this area when you are feeling overly independent.

* Always start with an intention. I say,"Help always shows up at the right time,"

* Clean and declutter this area.

*Pictures of loved ones who are in heaven.

* Spiritual symbols

* The color silver or gray.


The Helpful People area of my home is my office. This is one of my favorite rooms in my home. I love how the Helpful gua is where I help others.

Fresh flowers on a silver tray and a pair of rosary beads:

 Although in heaven for over 9 years, I feel my mother's grace and love each and every day:

Butterflies symbolize those visiting from heaven. This is what I just saw out my office window:

Have fun. Remember Feng Shui is pronounced FUN Shway. Enjoy making your home a mirror to your wonderful life.
Blessings,
Virginia

Monday's Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying A Course In Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

You have so little faith in yourself because you are unwilling to accept that perfect love is in you.

Mondays Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying the Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.


Today I will accept God's peace and joy, in glad exchange for all the substitutes that I have made for happiness and peace. ACIM

Perfect Timing

When the first greens started popping in my  perennial  garden, I frantically searched for the pointy heads of my lillies of the valley. I had planted them in honor of my mom as they were her favorite. Everyday I looked for their little buds and everyday I was disappointed. I thought for sure my over zealous black eyed susans had choked them out. So I stopped looking and focused on the many emerging perennials.






               Today I came across these.

Once again my garden has taught me that life happens in perfect timing, not my timing.

Monday's Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying  The Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

My happiness and my function are one. ACIM

Empty Spaces

Ten years back, just a few years in to single parenting, I decided to make a fresh start. On a wing and a prayer, I moved from New Hampshire to Maine. One of the reasons I bought this home was the amazingly kid friendly back yard. I knew the gigantic swing set, the play hut and the acre of woods would be the perfect place for my children to play, explore, create and grow.

Time passes. Those cuties are now bigger than me.  The hours of back yard games and watching kids play in the woods and swings and in the back yard hut have somehow passed. The many dinners in the car between games and practices  and  the ping ponging from field to field have passed as well. Those were crazy and exhausting days.  I made many sacrifices to be present for my children and  I wouldn't  change any of it.

As those years passed ,the swing set deteriorated and the back yard hut became a sagging collector of crap. So those 'bigger than me' cuties and I embarked on a demolition project. The swing set, the hut and years of collected stuff  now lie in here.

The emptying has created a vacant spot. A vacancy similar to the one I feel in myself , as single mothering has become more vague.  My day to day life is no longer overflowing with single mom responsibilities. I feel both a sadness and an excitement.  That dumpster symbolizes the new space I am creating for myself.  As each of my children take steps into their futures, away from me, I get to take a journey  filling the new spaces in my life.

Spring Miracles

My beloved lilac bush that sits adjacent to my home got pummeled this past winter.  More than six feet of snow landed on it. Plus  the snow that needed to be shoveled off of the roof fell on it.  Many branches snapped and the ones that remained intact arched to the ground with icicles dangling. I was so overwhelmed with the shoveling, the roof raking, and the endless ice dams I pretty much gave up on the lilac bush's survival.

Evidently once again I underestimated the power of  solid roots and the miracles of spring. My lilac bush has never looked more beautiful or smelled more lovely in the years I have been here.

That lilac bush is the perfect metaphor of life. We have all lived through snapped branches, and the piling and piling of life on top of us. People have given up on us and we may have given up on ourselves. Then spring comes and somehow we are more vital, more joyous and stronger both in spite of life's storms and because of life's storms.

Monday's Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying the Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

Let me recognize my problems have been solved. ACIM

Mondays Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying The Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.

Forgiveness is my function as the light of the world. ACIM

Tuesday's Tips

Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week
                                                                  Spanish Proverb


One hour ago I sat down to write this blog on procrastination.
I decided to have a snack first.
Then the dog needed to go out.
Then the  dog needed me to play a few rounds of catch.
Then the laundry needed to be folded.
Then the dishes needed to be put away.
Then I noticed the pile of mail to go out.
Then I thought of chopping some ice.
Then I laughed and came back to my office and just began.

We all procrastinate, oftentimes unconsciously.  Here are a few of my own strategies to keep that pesky procrastination at bay.

1.Recognize it. Be nice to yourself. Start again.
      I am aware that I tend to procrastinate, so I try to recognize it. It takes some detective work. All of those things I did instead of starting this blog were things that had to be done.Procrastination can look like work. It just isn't the work you intended to do.
When I see myself procrastinating, I laugh it off and start again. I don't beat myself up over it.

2. Start small.
       When I went back to my office, I told myself I was going to organize my notes I wrote yesterday in preparation for the blog. I am pretty sure that had I started with the intention of reviewing my notes, the desire to have a snack would never have occurred to me.

3. Set a timer. Reward yourself.
           A few years back, I took a few online graduate courses. I hadn't taken a graduate course in 15 years and I struggled with the APA formatting. That struggle lead to some serious procrastination.   To conquer the procrastination, I set a timer for 30 minutes and gave all of my attention to my coursework. When the timer went off I would reward myself. Then I would go back and do it all over again.

4. Let go of the outcome.
           Most procrastination is about perfectionism. No matter how many articles, blog posts, or courses I have written, the gremlin still invades. The gremlin is that voice in my head proclaiming, "That is horrible writing."
" Everybody will hate it."
 "This really sucks."
 In response to the gremlin, I remind myself that perfection is unattainable and what others think is none of my business.

5. Set a specific schedule.
            I  love to exercise. I just don't like to start. Thus, I made the habit to exercise every morning after my children get on the bus. It is nonegotiable and has made the starting so much easier.

6. Change your scenery.
 I like to go to the public library to get serious writing done. At the library there are no dishes, no laundry and no dog to distract me. Also sometimes a change of scenery means to get outside for fresh air. Of course, you have to come back. Use a timer.

Good luck and here's to making tomorrow the least busiest day of the week.

Blessings,
Virginia

Mondays Course in Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying The Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote from the text.


For you will be content only in magnitude, which is your home. ACIM

Feng Shui Friday

I teach courses on Feng Shui and I also incorporate it in my coaching practice and in my own home. It is a wonderful tool in creating a more tranquil and enjoyable life. I am dedicating Friday's blog on all things Feng Shui.

This is the second week of the nine week Bagua Map course. The Bagua map shows where the nine areas(guas) of life are positioned in your home. Each week I will give you tips on how to enhance one of the guas in your life in each area of your home. Last week I covered Knowledge and Self Cultivation. This week I will cover Elders.

Elders, which refers to all family, here and  beyond, is located in the middle left side of your home. If you are struggling with family members, have some unresolved issues with those who have passed or even if you aren't feeling like you are on a solid foundation this is the place to clean up and touch up. Family is the foundation of life regardless of age. I believe our ancestors want to offer us support in life.

Some ideas for enhancing the Elders gua:
*Start with an intention. Both of my parents have passed. When I miss them. This is the place I go and my intention is "Mom and Dad are always with me."
* Clean and declutter
* Use green as a color enhancer.
* Decorate with things made of wood.
*Put up favorite pictures of family members.

My Elders Gua is in my kitchen.  I painted it my favorite shade of green . One of my wooden decorations that I love.

I also change the fridge pictures every week. 

Enjoy and remember Feng Shui is pronounced FUN Shway. Have fun making your home a mirror of your wonderful life.

Blessings,

Virginia

Love

As I have noted previously, each new year I pick a word instead of making any resolutions. I try to use the word as a backdrop to everything  I do, say or think. Note I said TRY. I fall short quite often. Yet, as each year ends I am amazed at how much the word I chose enhanced my life.

This year I chose LOVE. I try to ask, as Robert Holden, suggests, "What would Love do in this situation?" It has been an amazing process, as Love always answers when I stop to ask and listen for the answer from within.

I have also been practicing more self love. As an extremely busy single mother of teenagers, I sometimes leave my needs out of the equation of daily life. It is a funny thing, self love. Our culture limits it to bubble baths and dark chocolate when it is so much more.

So what does self love look like?

Here is something I have learned so far, just three months in.

* Sometimes self love is having tea with a difficult emotion. You know, the one that keeps returning and you don't want to feel. It doesn't feel so loving . Yet when I let it be and actually feel the crappiness of it all,  it starts to dissipate.

*Self Love means hanging out with that feeling a bit longer to ask "What do you want to teach me?"

*Self love means waiting patiently for the answer.

The answer comes and it is always centered around more love.

Mondays Course In Miracles

My daily spiritual practice includes studying the Course in Miracles. Each Monday I share a quote.

Ask and it shall be given to you because it already has been given. Ask for light and learn you ARE light. ACIM

Feng Shui Friday

I teach courses on Feng Shui. I also incorporate it in my coaching practice and my own home. It is a wonderful tool in creating a more tranquil and enjoyable life.  I am dedicating Friday's blog to all things Feng Shui.

For the next nine weeks I will teach you about the The Bagua Map. The Bagua Map shows where the nine areas (guas) of life are positioned in your home. Each week I will give you tips on how to enhance one of  the nine areas of your home.

Place the map down on your home's layout with your front entrance being on the bottom. Don't worry about walls or the fact that your home may not be a perfect rectangle. Do remember , however, that guas outside of your home matter. For instance, my home has a screened in porch and deck jutting out of the middle back of the house. That means my Abundant Blessings and Love Marriage guas are outside. I will give suggestions on each gua if it happens to be outside.


Knowledge and Self Cultivation gua is in the front left of your home. This gua is about wisdom that comes from stillness and the peace and strong sense of self that inner wisdom brings.

If you are feeling scattered, unsure of yourself and you have lost your peaceful mojo this would be a great area to work on.

Some ideas for enhancing the Knowledge and Self Cultivation gua:
* Always start with an intention. When I clean and decorate my porch I say out loud," I trust my intuition and I always have time to be still."
* Clean and declutter
*A spot to be quiet and still.
* Pictures of places in nature you find meditative and peaceful
* Inspirational Sayings

My knowledge area is my front porch. As I said, outside matters too,

I drink my coffee out here most days, even in winter. Sitting on the bench I can see my garden which is somewhere under there.

I decorate the porch each season. We are still on the Valentine theme. My snowshoes remind me to take some me time in the woods.

Everyone who enters reads this .

Enjoy and remember Feng Shui is pronounced FUN Shway. Have fun making your home the mirror of your wonderful life.

Blessings,
Virginia

Three Steps to Achieve Any Goal

Close to two months have past since making those New Year resolutions. For most of us, the promises made haven't been kept.  In my own life and in many of my clients' experiences setting goals require more than making a promise. Goal setting involves asking a few questions.



1, First ask yourself why you want to achieve this goal. Spend some time with the answers that come up, paying special attention to your ego. For instance if you want to write a book to be heard or to become important. that is your ego talking. If you want to write because  you want to share your voice  or entertain then you are doing for the greater good. Also remember goals set for someone else don't work either.  Make the goal for you.

2. Secondly. What have you succeeded at in your life? Write the list.  Having a tangible list of the amazing things you have done will boost your confidence.

3. Finally ask yourself what is working in your life now? By appreciating now you stay in the present instead of living in the future. So often when we set goals we  get stuck in the future and we make our happiness about then instead of now. Choosing to be happy right where you are will make the process of achieving your goal more enjoyable.

Remember life is supposed to be fun. The joy is in the journey not the destination.

Complaining to Gratitude

If you don't like something change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it. Don't complain. Maya Angelou

I haven't made a Lenten promise in years but this year I decided to go back to my Catholic roots.
 I liked the idea of doing something for 40 days that would help me grow into a more loving person. I decided to stop complaining. Sounded easy enough as I am generally an optimistic person.

They say what you put your attention to grows. So as I was paying attention to my thoughts and my words for complaints, it should come as no surprise that there was A LOT of complaining going on.

Another snow storm?
Water is leaking where?
You need a ride when?
Another medical bill?

As I caught myself complaining, I forgot another even more important intention. My word for 2015 is LOVE. I wasn't being very loving to myself for complaining. In fact, I was being downright mean.

I could give up on my Lenten promise yet I really feel that complaining is a waste of time. I needed to tweak it just a bit. So now each time I catch myself complaining, I stop mid thought or mid sentence  and without judgement simply recognize that I am complaining. Then I find three things to appreciate.

No doubt about it, ice dams, six feet of snow, bills and teenagers have the ability to aggravate even Buddha himself. Yet they pale in comparison to all that is perfect.

                          Now that is one giant ice dam.

                                         YET

If I just turn my head, I get this glorious view.

Blessings,
Virginia